Falling
by Demeterr
Summary: Because it's easy to fall. To fall in love. For relationships to fall apart. Because it's difficult to get back up. ::Incomplete:: ::Hinata.centric::
1. Chapter 1

**Falling**_ - "If you keep treating me so kindly, I'm really going to fall for you" - "Then I'll catch you" _

* * *

Falling (Part I)

The door stood as a barrier, the high windows and shut door giving no clue what was inside. The faint sound of chatter drifting to where I stood, facing the door, more than hesitant to enter it. My lips pressed together into what I called my determined face before it gave way to another sigh. Surely it was not that hard, just knocking on the door then opening to enter my new class.

It was not to say that I did not know anyone in this school, after all my cousin was in the grade above, enrolling just like I had, though I doubted that he was facing the same dilemma I had. How long since I had been back here? Five, six years?

I still vaguely remembered some of the students in my grade back when I was in primary, and only the other day I had looked over my old grade four school photos in an attempt to refresh my memory. But I doubt the pictures would help much, after all everyone had changed so much, myself included.

I sighed once more, tugging at my short dark shoulder length hair. I wondered if anyone would recognize me, wondered if anyone even remembered a Hyuga Hinata. It had been so long, and I honestly did not want to break the barrier and enter the unknown.

A quick glance at my watch promptly told her that I had to enter soon or else I would be too late. I was already slightly late but I knew that would be overlooked as I had the excuse I had to sign myself in at the office after all this was my first day.

Smoothing out of dark green jumper and skirt one last time I raised my hand to knock on the door at the same moment it slid open and dark eyes stared blankly at me. I blinked in surprise before adverting my gaze to observe the classroom as my hand dropped uselessly back to my side.

I was starting to feel embarrassed now as the occupants of the room had their attention fixated at me. A clearing of a throat brought my attention back to the male standing in front of me, looking impatient. With a start I realized I must have been in the way and promptly took a step to the side and he moved past me, walking down the corridor without a second glance.

* * *

_...and that was how I first met him..._

* * *

"I'm a new student," I said in a soft voice for the third time today in yet another class, more than aware that the class had once again focused their attention on me.

"Please take a free seat-" the teacher paused to glance down at the forms of paper she was holding. "Hyuga-san," the crimson-eyed woman smiled.

My lips twitched into a smile in response before I turned around to face the class, grey eyes scanning the room to search for an unoccupied seat whilst attempting to avoid the gazes of others, seeing how I had yet to make any friends in this class. A blonde haired girl smiled at me, making a small gesture towards an empty seat that was in front of her.

With no where else better to go, and not wanting to be rude to someone who was so kindly offering me a seat, I crossed over, placing my bag on the table and sitting down, immediately turning sideways in my seat so I could face the girl. I offered a small smile.

"I'm Yamanka Ino. Let me know if you have any troubles," the blonde said in greeting.

"I'm Hyuga Hinata, I hope we get along well," I said politely, glancing briefly at her face before my gaze travelled sideways to a boy who was looking in my direction.

As if noticing I was looking at him, his head turned in my direction and before I could lower my gaze he looked at me. He seemed to have no issue at catching me staring and returned a stare as well as offering a grin. I had dropped my gaze then.

"Naruto, stop staring at the new girl, you are creeping her out." Ino remarked.

"Ah but she's so cute," exclaimed the boy without any shame, before adding in, "I'm Naruto, nice to meet you."

I could feel myself start to blush. I did not need his introduction to know him, after all his face was just way too familiar to me, even without the need for that extra glance at the school photos. The grin, so similar to his childhood one was enough to make the blood rush to my face.

* * *

_...and like that the school days passed by... _

* * *

"I like you... I've always liked you!"

End Part One 

* * *

A/N (14/2/08): Well this is actually meant to be a one-shot, but due to my lack of planning, it is going to be longer. I had the plot written up ages ago, and I thought 'O, I'll actually get to writing it in February', needless to say I forgot about said plot, and after much rushing and taking the introduction from another story I was thinking of, I have produced a Part One in time for Valentines (and I only really started making this story today -go me-)

Uhm... those short italic lines are narration (probably) and represent a skip in time. I shall probably get the next part up within a month or so, after all I've planned most of it, and I hope you readers can tolerate the somewhat dodgy plot, difference in writing styles and.. lack of real planning. Thanks again if any of you are reading, and please let me know any mistakes or whatnot. Happy V-day

-Demeterr


	2. Chapter 2

**Falling**_ - "If you keep treating me so kindly, I'm really going to fall for you" - "Then I'll catch you" _

* * *

Falling (Part II)

Against my will I found myself falling for him again and I was selfish, refusing to be content with sheer friendship. By what I was going to do now, I was going to ruin any chances of this friendship.

"I like you... I've always liked you!" I blurted out, holding a letter parallel to my lowered head as I stared at the ground.

He was quiet, and for a moment I wondered if he was still there. I glanced up tentatively, my eyes hidden by my fringe to see him still standing there. His face was like a blank canvas. Wordlessly he took the letter from my hands and he opened it, all the while not looking at me.

His blue eyes read through the page, not skimming through it, but taking in slowly what I had painstakingly written. Just as I thought he had reached the end, his eyes lifted though not to look at me, but merely at the top of the page as he reread it again.

Finally he looked up, and gave a smile. "Okay," Naruto said simply.

With that warm smile, I relaxed, shoving all hesitations aside for the time being. I knew that if I got rejected that I would not attempt to mend the friendship, after all it would be too painful to see that smiling face. A smile from the guy I liked so much whilst I was so sad, I couldn't take that. I wouldn't be able to face him. But it was okay now.

* * *

_...and he probably knew as well..._

* * *

I was surprised to see Ino sitting in my seat, next to Naruto with their tables close together and pieces of paper littered over the tables. They didn't notice me and instead chatted eagerly to each other. At that moment Ino threw her head back and laughed, before she noticed me, standing at the door.

Before she could say anything, the teacher beckoned me over to explain that whilst I had been absent the last lesson, the class has been assigned to do group projects. Apparently there was still one boy who was yet to have a partner, and the teacher merely said to just find the person in the last row that was without a partner. I made my way to the back row, pausing at Naruto and Ino's combined desk to make my greetings.

"Ah I'm so sorry Hinata. I didn't realize you were coming back so soon," Ino apologised immediately.

"It's fine," I automatically responded.

Why was she apologizing like that? It wasn't such a big deal; after all it was just a group project. The two were still looking at me, almost expectantly, as if waiting for me to say something. It was as if I was some bother to them. Stunned by my own thoughts, I turned my head away with the pretence of looking at the back row.

"I'm going now to..." my words froze as they turned back to their work, "...to find my partner now," I continued the last part in a whisper.

I felt like some one-way mirror has separated them from me. I could look in, but they couldn't see me. It was as if they were in a dimension of their own. It hurt me to look at them; I was stupid for feeling jealous. After all they had been friends for years, they wouldn't put a pause of friendship just because of me. I was being selfish again.

I moved to the back row, easily locating my partner. Seeing that dark mess of hair and the equally dark eyes that were not looking at me, I recognised him immediately. Although I had seen him many times, we had never been face to face directly since my first day. There was something about him that was unapproachable in my eyes, yet others seem to ignore the invisible barrier that was around him.

Given the chance, I would not have wanted to approach him. I would rather work with Naruto or Ino. My emotions sunk again into unhappiness as my mind went back to them. Stop being selfish Hinata. Stop being jealous. These emotions are ugly.

"Hello Uchiha-san." These were my first words to him.

He reacted to the sound of his name, lifting his head to look at me, and then those eyes fixated on me. The way he looked at me was scrutinising, as if he was inspecting something. Finally he nodded as if in approval before his gaze dropped to his table, where he promptly swept his belongings to one half of the table.

I watched his behaviour in polite but blank silence. Sasuke seemed to realize that as his head jerked up again and this time he seemed to glare at me. Did I do something wrong? I wondered to myself. He continued to look expectantly at me, and I stared blankly back at him.

"A chair," he finally snapped.

There was a chair at the table beside it so I reached for it. My hands lingered on the back of the chair as I wondered whether I should ask if I needed to bring a table over as well. Deciding against asking him, I moved the chair beside him and took a slight step back, wondering if I should really sit. He had already cleared space, so I supposed that meant I could sit.

I sat down, somewhat nervous with my hands clasped in my lap but he did not seem to notice. After a moment he slide a textbook over to me along with a sheet of paper. Sasuke gave his instructions, making me repeat them back to him before he turned back to his work and we both worked in silence. The work was simple and it didn't require much effort.

My gaze drifted, my hand still writing, and settled on Naruto and Ino. It was as if I had swallowed something bitter, and that bitter substance had brought clarity along with it. Friends didn't chat so eagerly like that, friends didn't stare at each other, as the other was the only person in their world. It was like a sunflower soaking up the rays of sun.

And I hated it. I hated myself too. Disgusting.

* * *

_...and then the expected came... _

* * *

"I'm sorry, but I've fallen for someone else."

End Part Two

* * *

A/N (3/3/08): Ah..This is not the end. I thought I could sum up the end of it in another chapter, but then as I wrote, I started reaching the same length as the first chapter yet I was nowhere near the end of my ideas. Thus. This story might be a three or four part. It's fun to write, a high school story. I rarely do that, apart from the occasionally one shot. Don't think it's going so well, feedback isn't what I expected, but thanks to those who reviewed.

Oh yeah, I started another story "Ripples of Silence", it's slightly different from my other stories, but check it out if you are interested. I'll try to get part 3 up within a month. Wish me luck Reviews help me write faster too heh.

-Demeterr

* * *


	3. Chapter 3

**Falling**_ - "If you keep treating me so kindly, I'm really going to fall for you" - "Then I'll catch you" _

* * *

Falling (Part III)

Along with those disgusting emotions of jealously that were brewing up inside me, it came along with a realization. It only made me hating myself even more. I was such a horrible person. I had already ruined our friendship. I had pushed the boundaries, broke past the line of friendship because I knew he would catch me. Naruto was kind, that was just the type of person he was. But no doubt he would still reach the conclusion that pretending would only hurt me more, no doubt he would have one moment of selfishness and pick his happiness first.

"I'm sorry, but I've fallen for someone else," I lied staring at the ground instead of his face.

As nice as Naruto was, I knew he would not keep up with this facade and keep dating me. He would always look at me, with those solemn blue eyes, and look ready to say something. Every time he looked at me like that, I could feel my world freeze over. I knew he was deciding to break up with me. I knew that.

It was not fair. Even now I was being selfish. By breaking up with Naruto myself, it spared me from having to hear him try to speak those words. No doubt he would say it in a gentler manner, saying something like the excuse of thinking that we just weren't meant to be and that it was his fault not mine. No doubt he would insist we would still be friends.

I knew that if he broke up with me, it would tear me apart and probably tear him apart as well in result. He was too nice. As much as I wanted to continue to stay in this oblivious bliss, and pretend that everything was alright I knew that I could not like this. I didn't want his pity anymore. In this way I was trying to convince myself that I wasn't a bad person. That I was doing the right thing, yet that didn't make me feel better.

"If that's what you really want Hinata," Naruto said gently.

"It is. I'm sorry." I still didn't look up, fearing to look at his face. If I looked up, surely my hold on my emotions would slip by the expression on his face. Was he sad? Or was he relieved? My eyes burnt at that thought and I blinked rapidly to clear the feeling. I was okay. I was okay, I continued to think to myself.

"Okay," he said so simply, agreeing as simply to breaking up as to when he accepted my feelings. "Thank-you Hinata," he murmured as he thanked me.

I remained still, staring at the ground, wondering how it could look so level when right now my whole world seem tipped and unbalanced. My eyes stung with tears again but I ignored them, trying to pretend that I was fine.

* * *

_... and my world broke and I fell ... _

* * *

I just wanted to sleep. At least then it would stop hurting so much. The bed in the nurse's office was uncomfortable but right now that didn't matter. My eyelids were heavy but I did not want to close it. If I did that I could just keep recalling that moment. It was too painful. Whenever my mind drifted off it would return to the scene, and like a broken tape recorder it would just repeat over and over again. An endless loop. 

Part of me wished I could have stayed in that sweet delusion for longer, but it would only hurt more to come out of it at a later stage. At this doing this myself would give me time to heal. Or at least that was what I had thought before hand. I never knew that it would hurt this much. If love hurts this much I'd rather not fall in love.

It suddenly felt hard to breathe again. I tried to think of something happy but even then it just seemed so saddening. I couldn't forget. If I acted like this by myself, how could I restrain my feelings when I was around them?

Hearing the sound of footsteps approaching, I rolled slightly so that I lay on my side, facing the wall, before shutting my eyes in pretence of sleep. Already in this darkness, my mind was reliving the scenario. The door slid open. I waited, listening for the footsteps.

The footsteps crossed over and I continued with the faking of sleep. Yet another pretence. It was so disgusting.

I waited for the person who entered to turn away and leave already, so that I could open my eyes and get rid of that stupid memory replaying in my head. There was a thump as something dropped on the ground, and from the sound I assumed that it was near me. My eyes flickered open now, just enough so I could see through my lashes to view the plain white wall.

There was no shadow casting over me so I turned my head to view the room. It was not empty.

Sitting on the ground, no doubt the reason for the sound, was a person. I did not move any further, else my movements alert them to my awaken presence and lest they actually speak to me. Words could barely escape from me calmly, even speaking to nurse almost break the thin hold over my emotions. Every time I thought I was calm, I just fell into a state of disarray again.

He was as still as a statue so I turned my head back around again to view the plain white wall.

* * *

_... it was like a blank canvas, not yet ruined, so unlike my heart..._

* * *

"Why are you here?" 

End Part Three

* * *

A/N (20/03/08): Had the first half of this chapter ready ages ago, the second part was a bit harder, took me a couple attempts to write it before I got what I wanted. I'm still delaying the next chapter since I haven't exactly decided that I want to put since too many ideas in head. T.T

Writing the last italic part, as well as the quote from the next chapter was hard. Can't think of anything that just sounds right so I settled with that. Strange how most of my inspirations comes when I am supposed to be doing work. Anyways thanks for those who reviewed, I don't think I'd be much of a writer were it not for others reading and remarking.

It really is hard writing in the first person view, as I have to try to make the emotions of Hinata as realistic as possible which is extremely hard since I find it hard to relate to this situation. Does it seem realistic? Reviews are appreciated. Happy Easter guys.

-Demeterr

* * *


	4. Chapter 4

**Falling**_ - "If you keep treating me so kindly, I'm really going to fall for you" - "Then I'll catch you" _

* * *

Falling (Part IV)

Time continued to flow and I felt like a separate entity from it. Lying here, staring at that pure white wall, I lost track of time. How long since lunchtime had ended, so long have I avoided him? How long was I going to stay like this? I wanted nothing more than to forget, I wanted nothing more than for life to return to the way it was, before I overstepped the line of friendship.

"What are you doing here?" a voice asked.

My eyes fluttered shut immediately, as I cowardly feigned sleep again. It wasn't until another voice replied that I realized the speaker who asked the question was not addressing it to me.

"My friend isn't too well," was the curt reply.

I recognized that voice immediately, the same one that had snapped orders for me to get a chair, the same person who I was working on the project with. Once I heard the questioner walk away, I started to count silently in my head, waiting for the moment to pretend to awaken. If I awoke now, it would seem suspicious.

"Uchiha-san?" I asked hesitantly, sitting upright.

He turned at the sound of my voice, not a sign of surprise visible on his face. He gave a brief nod in response before he rose to his feet, leaning to reach for something before straightening up again. He dropped my bag on the bed, near my feet before he turned and walked towards the door.

"A-Ah," I said in surprise at his abrupt attempt to exist.

Sasuke lingered at the doorway, his face set into a mask of polite blankness. Realizing that he was expecting an answer, I instantly searched my mind for a comment.

"Why are you here?" I finally asked.

"Sensei told me to," his answer clashed with what he said to the other person earlier.

"I... I see. Thank you for bringing my bag," I blurted out.

He looked at me once more, before turning to exit the room.

It did not concern me too badly that his answer to me was different to what he said to the other person. Sensei probably did tell him to bring my bag, seeing how this was the last session of the day, but his staying was of his own choice.

* * *

_... and that unexpected act of kindness made all the difference..._

* * *

I had not seen Ino or Naruto yet today. They were not in any of my earlier classes. Cowardly, I had taken any choices of bumping into them at recess away and instead went to see teachers to find out what work I had missed out on yesterday. There was no chance of avoiding them now though.

As I moved towards the next class, the hallway was startling clear, and I could see the two standing with the others outside the classroom. Seeing them together, so happily, my heart felt a stab of pain. I could already feel myself weakening. I crossed over to them, plastered a small smile on my face as I greeted them.

With their reactions, I knew that Ino had not known yet. Naruto's expression however was of surprise for a moment before he quickly masked it and greeted me brightly. His smile and his voice seemed so fake to me, and my smile weakened. My gaze dropped immediately, and I could see that my hands were trembling. Quickly I clenched them, digging my nails into my palm in an attempt to get rid of the feelings of sadness. I barely felt the physical pain.

"A-Ah, let's go in," I remarked, holding back my relief.

I didn't wait for them and entered the classroom, moving immediately to the back row to where I sat with Sasuke. At least in this session I wouldn't have to face them. Sasuke and I worked quietly, as I tried to put all my concentration into the work. Right now, I could still pretend it was fine. But I knew that as soon as Ino found out, the pretence could no longer exist.

I took a glance at them. Again they looked like the perfect picture of romance. Chattering so happily. My eyes burnt with a feeling I recognized too well. I felt like crying. In response, my hand, the one I wasn't using to write, clenched in my lap, nails digging into skin. Why wouldn't the pain go away?

"Your knuckles are going white," a low voice commented.

I flinched in surprise; head snapping back as I realized Sasuke was talking to me. Not only that, he staring pointedly at my left hand. I unclenched my fist immediately, keeping the palm face down, as I did not want him to see the nail marks I knew were there. His gaze shifted now, looking to where I was staring earlier. I did not turn my head to follow his gaze. I did not want to look at them.

"I've known him since I was young so he's like an open book to me. Looking at him, I can tell that he likes her..." he trailed off for a moment. "But even you could tell that, can't you?" Sasuke asked.

I stared at him in surprise, my mouth opening and closing as I tried to think of something to say. I wanted to ask him what he was on about, I wanted to deny it. But that would just be another lie that I didn't want to tell.

* * *

_... I didn't want to pretend anymore ..._

* * *

"I know."

End Part Four

* * *

A/N (14/04/08): It has been two months exactly since I started this project. It has indeed gone longer than I expected. It's also a tad bit diminishing how I have more alerts for this story than the total number of reviews, but thanks to those that review, or alert, or favourite it. At least in that way I know that people actually like it.

A question regarding this story, how do you think Ino should find out that Naruto and Hinata broke up? From Naruto or Hinata, from both, or from another source entirely? I wonder which source will have the most effect.

Also, I know this is a bit selfish to ask, but if any of you readers are staff of the "kamoku Ai : Shy love" c2, would you please add this story to it. Please and thank-you.

-Demeterr


	5. Chapter 5

_Because it's easy to fall. To fall in love. For relationships to fall apart. Because it's difficult to get back up. _

* * *

Falling (Part V)

The moment he said that, my world seemed to freeze to a halt. The sounds of the classroom seemed to fade to a blur. His words seemed to echo in my mind. My hand was trembling again. Why was he asking me this?

The way he had said that, made it seem like I was the bad person. Had I done anything wrong? I did not know that they were in love with each other. It was not like I had forced Naruto to accept me, he could have rejected me if he had wanted to. It was not like I didn't tell Ino that I was planning to confess. It was not like she had told me that she had liked him.

No doubt he was saying it to me because he wanted me to step out of the way so Naruto and Ino's relationship could finally exist. He and Naruto were best friends after all.

"I know," I murmured, as my eyes blurred with tears. "That's w-why... that's why we already broke up."

I hated the way my voice sounded, despite my attempts to sound calm, it came out as unstable as my emotions. He made no response, so I glanced at his face. His dark eyes were wide in surprise. My gaze dropped again, away from him and back to my work. I did not want to speak anymore, speaking was breaking the net I had over my emotions.

I could feel the dampness of tears on my cheeks. I wiped my eyes hastily, my hand clenching again. I concentrated on the physical pain, in an attempt to numb the rest of my feelings. He didn't make any more attempts to talk to me again that session.

* * *

_... because it's always easier to fall ..._

* * *

I spent the rest of the day with my usual friends. They didn't seem to notice that I didn't talk much. Maybe it was cause Naruto was acting as a distraction. Even now I couldn't hate Naruto.

It would have been easier to, he had given me false hope, he was so blind to the way he acted around Ino, but he was kind. He didn't have to be nice to me now, but he still was. He hadn't told anyone the news that we had broken up, probably because he thought I didn't want anyone to know yet.

The more time I spent around my friends, the more I realized I should let Ino know the truth. At least then I could drop one pretence, at least then I would be able to face them without feeling so guilty. At least then so I could let go of these bottled feelings.

So at least those two could be happy. But it was so hard to let those words escape from my mouth. Every time I tried to speak, I could feel my emotions well up again. Lunch had already ended. Ino was already walking to her next class.

"I-Ino-" I called out after her, moving quickly after her.

She paused mid step, turning around with a quizzical look on her face. It was then that I realized I hadn't spoken to her almost all day.

"After school... can I speak to you?" I asked softly.

"Of course Hinata," she responded, beaming brightly.

I gave a small smile in response before I turned around and went back the way I came, pausing by Naruto who was still standing in the corridor. I haven't spoken to him much today either. I mustered a smile as I lifted my head to look at him.

"Today I'm going to tell Ino. So... so you don't have to keep pretending," I told him, giving one last smile before moving to my last class.

The sound of my voice surprised me. How it sounded so calm.

I barely paid attention during the rest of the lesson, instead it was trying to visualize the conversation I was to have with Ino. To think of what exactly I should say, trying to imagine her reactions so that I could be prepared. So that I wouldn't break down whilst trying to tell her the truth.

At the end of school, I rushed out towards the main entrance, as I tried to spot Ino. It wasn't difficult to spot that familiar head of blonde, over the past couple days I had become such an expert at spotting her and avoiding her. It felt strange that skill would actually come in handy to find her.

It wasn't until I was closer to her that she finally spotted me, breaking away from her group of friends as she probably sensed the need for privacy. There was an obvious question visible in her eyes, but she approached me calmly and silently.

I made the final step towards her.

* * *

_... because it's harder to get back up ..._

* * *

"I just thought I'd let you know that Naruto and I are no longer dating."

End Part Five

* * *

A/N (01/05/08): Well the summary changed. I felt like I should include them as the uh... quotes in this chapter, partly because I wanted to emphasis the change in the summary, and partly because I was too lazy to rack my brain for more thoughts. Usually I don't change summaries, in fact prior to this story I don't believe I ever did. However the change in summary comes due to the fact that, well the story is shifting greatly away from what it was initially meant to be, and I felt the original summary no longer suited this story in any way.

Hm the last part seems a bit... rushed and a bit off. I had most of this chapter written in advance, since I was going to finish it off later but had to study, then exams and whatnot. Still meant to be studying, but here is the chapter. Thanks to all those that reviewed. The amount of total reviews is finally catching up towards the amount of alerts.

-Demeterr


	6. Chapter 6

_Because it's easy to fall. To fall in love. For relationships to fall apart. Because it's difficult to get back up. _

* * *

Falling (Part VI)

This way, I could finally leave the lie behind. This way, I could clear the weight off my shoulder. This way, maybe I could finally heal. Yet even so, it was so hard for the words to get out. Yet Ino didn't speak, still waiting for me to talk... and for a while we just stood there.

"I just thought I'd let you know that Naruto and I are no longer dating," I finally said, trying to speak as casually as I could, whilst maintaining eye contact with Ino. Because this was just meant to be general news, it wasn't meant to become a big deal.

Ino looked surprised. She wasn't happy, nor was she hopeful. I really couldn't hate this person.

I had to answer her question quickly. Hesitation would just make it worse.

"Eh? It doesn't really matter," I tried to brush it off softly.

"It does." Ino insisted. "You really liked him. I should speak with Nar-"

"No!" I cut her off, extending my hands as a sign to get her to stop.

She looked startled as I cut her off.

"No," I repeated, softer this time. "Really, it doesn't matter."

I turned away, breaking eye contact as the tears I tried so hard to hold back during our conversation began to fall.

"Wai-" Ino begun.

"Anyway, my bus is there. See you later Ino," I said, managing a half glance back at her, as I kept my head down so my fringe shielded my eyes.

It was better this way.

I didn't deserve happiness.

I was doing the right thing.

* * *

_... but then why did it hurt so much? ..._

* * *

I kept my head down in the bus, picking an empty seat near the front half of the bus - where there were less people. My bag was placed next to me, although it was not like anyone would sit there. The bus I caught had enough seats that no one had to double, unless they wanted to. For that I was grateful.

A person dropped into the seat next to me, almost on my bag, and I jumped in surprise, before I turned sharply to view the speaker. What was Sasuke doing here?

I suddenly became that I had been crying. I hated crying. They made my eyes red. They made my breathing difficult. I wiped at my cheeks. They were still wet. My hands dropped back to my lap, clenching automatically.

"Your knuckles are going white again," he commented in an off-handed way.

I loosened my grip so my knuckles weren't so prominent.

"I saw you speaking with Ino," he finally announced, so softly.

My breath caught in my throat but I remained quiet. I did not want to talk. I did not want to hear the sadness... the pathetic tone in my voice. I took a breath to make up for the one that caught. It was ragged. It hurt to breathe.

"I-I don't want to talk now," I said softly.

The rest of the journey continued in silence, the only movements were from when his hand stretched out to hold the rail in front in order to stay in place whenever the bus turned. It was finally my stop. Gratefully, I stood up, moving past Sasuke and to the front of the bus. To the exit. To escape.

I stepped off the bus and it was a moment before I heard the sound of the doors closing, and of the bus driving off.

"Can we talk now?" his voice came from behind me.

I spun around, so fast that my world spun for a moment. His arm came up to steady me. My eyes jerked up to lock on his. His dark eyes were so clear. So solid. Unlike the rest of my world that continued to spin. No, my world had always been spinning, ever since I had noticed the way Ino and Naruto looked at each other.

It spun due to the turmoil.

Spun because my world was broken.

Spun because I could not regain my balance.

Spun because I could not get back up.

Spun because no one steadied me.

But there was an arm gripping mine now. An arm rooting me back to the shattered pieces of my world. An arm that gently guided me to the seats at the bus stop.

"Okay," I whispered. I gripped his arm because if I feared that he would brush me away once I started talking. Once he started hearing about me. Once he found out how I really was. He would turn away in repulse.

The words tumbled out of me, like the water bursting from a dam, finally set free. With it came the water of tears. I told him about how I had told Ino the truth. I told him about the insecurities I had felt. I told him about the hesitation I had about breaking up with Naruto. I told him the true reason why I decided to break up.

It wasn't because I was selfless. I was not a selfless person. I only did that so that Naruto would not be the one to break up with me. I only did that so Ino would not end up disliking me. I only did it so that people would think of me as a kind person. I only did it because I told myself it seemed like the noble thing to do.

I continued to speak until I had nothing else to say. Everything was out now. It wasn't bottled up anymore. It took effort to release my grip of Sasuke. He would dislike me. Hate me even. He would find out how revolting my soul really was. He would think that I deserved what I got.

After all, that was what I thought of myself. I hated myself. I hated the jealous me. I hated the selfish me that tried to pretend to be selfless.

But I didn't want to be hated. He was going to hate me. Just like how everyone else was going to hate me if they really knew me. That thought just made the tears fall harder.

"It's okay," Sasuke finally said, as he stayed sitting beside me. "It's okay," he repeated.

And with those two words of understanding... of forgiveness, the weight on my shoulders lightened.

It wasn't as painful to breathe anymore.

* * *

_... and finally the spinning stopped and I stood up again ..._

* * *

"I'm alright now."

End Part Six

* * *

A/N (28/08/08): It's been a while since an update. This was typed up in a hurry. Haven't really checked through it. I'm surprised I manage to finish this chapter to be honest since I felt like I was over fanfiction. But from re-reading 'Confessions' which is an awesome story (It's in my favourite's list so I would suggest you read it), I had the urge to at least quickly finish off the rest of my stories.

Anyways the last italic bit... "I stood up again" refers to like... Up to now, Hinata had 'fell', not literally. But now she is finally starting the process of healing, or metaphorically speaking: 'standing up again'. Just to say, the story still has quite a bit of plot left (haha does my story even have any plot?) and well... I guess this chapter stands as a changing point. Hopefully I can write some more romance into it. And. I guess the pairing of this story must seem really un-obvious. I'm still vaguely .. over the fact that no one has added this to kamoku:ai haha.

Reviews are appreciated. Thanks.

-Demeterr


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